Here's your very own top 10 list of why I dumped you 30 years ago:

10.	I thought that a quickie meant lasting more than 10 seconds.

9.	I had a premature infatuation.

8.	I believed the myth about a big nose and a member in good standing.

7.	With all of your groping, you never found my G spot.

6.	Erection rejection.

5.	I didn't know that you were allergic to my tuna delight.

4.	Your stock dropped about as fast as my panties.

3.	When you're hot, you're hot, but unfortunately, when you're not, you're not.

2.	My vibrator had more personality.

1.	Emission impossible.

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