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Yummy, yum. I just know that all of you connoisseurs of really great fruitcake will be please to know that I, Answer Lady, Oh My God! have my own personal recipe for fruitcake to die for. (You might as well ascend, once you're infilled with this amazing concoction.) None of that sticky, orange mystery fruit in mine. No gummy or crumbly mess. No smell of rancid alcohol or over-ripe fruit, either. You won't want to use it for a tetherball stand or a Christmas tree base like you have with past fruitcakes. You won't pass mine around from cousin to cousin and, three years later, get it back again. Oh, no. My fruitcake will turn your attitudes and assumptions right around, dearies. Are you brave enough to try it?
You will need the following ingredients:
| 1 pure, white dove | = | peace |
| 1 egg | = | simplicity |
| 8 cups of sugar | = | compassion |
| 4 cups of flour | = | to eradicate all hunger |
| 1 hymn, confettied | = | harmony |
| 1-10" marshmallow teddy bear | = | for the well-being of children everywhere |
| 1 large, ripe belly laugh | = | spontaneity |
|
1 team uniform jersey (any team will do) |
= | brotherhood |
| 1 apron string | = | service |
| 1 large blossom (your choice) | = | beauty |
| 1 diploma, diced | = | wisdom |
| 1-12" chocolate heart | = | love |
| 1 crayon (color of your choice) | = | creativity |
| 1 sunset | = | inspiration |
| 1 child's giggle | = | joy |
| 1 teaspoon blood | = | health |
| 1-$100 bill, shredded | = | abundance |
| 1 Medal of Honor | = | courage |
| 1 driver's license | = | responsibility |
| 1 pompom, grated | = | enthusiasm |
| Your favorite joke | = | humor |
| 1 translation of the Bible, or Koran, or Talbot, etc. | = | clarity |
| 1 rainbow | = | acceptance/tolerance |
| 1 angel's halo | = | grace |
| 1 thank-you note | = | gratitude |
| 1 bottle of extra-thick ketchup | = | patience |
In a small mixing bowl, mix together the egg, sugar, and blood. Melt together the chocolate heart and the marshmallow teddy bear, and stir them into this mixture. Set aside to gel.
In an enormous kettle, mix together the dove, hymn, belly laugh, jersey, blossom, diploma, crayon, sunset, money, Medal, license, pompom, joke, translation, rainbow, halo, thank-you note, and ketchup. Stir these ingredients together carefully with a shovel, so as not to bruise a single petal of the blossom.
Pour the chocolate mixture over the dove mixture and allow it to seep deeply down into the mixture. Allow one hour for the ingredients to meld together. A deep harmonic blending should take place.
Now gather together as many of your family, friends, loved ones, and strangers as you can and divvy out the goods (and I mean that - these really are goods!)
If we all feed on these items as we cross into the new millennium, we can create a shift in Consciousness so profound that we could release fears and doubts, rage and violence.
If we take these qualities deeply within and allow them to nourish us physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually, together we will all rise to this momentous occasion. We've come to Awaken. We will do so at our readiness. ARE YOU READY?
Be as nutty as a fruitcake and take the plunge into the next millennium. If you can't trust me, whom can you trust? After all, I'm the Answer Lady, Oh My God!
Thank you for having me in your lives, your hearts, and in your kitchens. I love you all deeply.
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