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1. |
Bifocals Barbie.
Comes with her own set of blended-lens fashion frames in six
wild colors (half-frames too)! Neck chain and large-print editions
of Vogue and Martha Stewart Living. |
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2. |
Hot Flash Barbie.
Press Barbie's bellybutton and watch her face turn beet red while
tiny drops of perspiration appear on her forehead! With handheld
fan and tiny tissues. |
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3. |
Facial Hair Barbie. As Barbie's hormone levels shift, see her whiskers
grow! Available with teensy tweezers and magnifying mirror. |
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4. |
Cook's Arms Barbie. Hide Barbie's droopy triceps with these new, roomier-sleeved
gowns. Good news on the tummy front, too: muumuus with tummy
support panels are included! |
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5. |
Bunion Barbie.
Years of disco dancing in stiletto heels have definitely taken
their toll on Barbie's dainty arched feet. Soothe her sores with
the pumice stone and plasters, then slip on soft terry mules. |
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6. |
No More Wrinkles Barbie. Erase those pesky crow's-feet and lip lines with
a tube of Skin Sparkle-Spackle, from Barbie's own line of exclusive
age-blasting cosmetics. |
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7. |
Soccer Mom Barbie. All that experience as a cheerleader is really paying
off as Barbie dusts off her old high school megaphone to root
for Babs and Ken, Jr. With mini van in robins egg blue or white,
and cooler filled with doughnut holes and fruit punch. |
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8. |
Mid-life Crisis Barbie. It's time to ditch Ken. Barbie needs a change, and
Bruce (her personal trainer) is just what the doctor ordered,
along with Prozac. They're hopping in her new red Miata and heading
for the Napa Valley to open a B&B. Comes with real tape of
"Breaking Up Is Hard to Do." |
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9. |
Divorced Barbie.
Sells for $199.99. Comes with Ken's house, Ken's car, and Ken's
boat. |
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10. |
Single Mother Barbie. There's not much time for primping anymore! Ken'
s shacked up with the Swedish au pair in the Dream House and
Barbie's across town with Babs and Ken, Jr., in a fourth-floor
walkup. Barbie's selling off her old gowns and accessories to
raise rent money. Complete garage sale kit included. |
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11. |
Recovery Barbie.
Too many parties have finally caught up with the ultimate party
girl. Now she does twelve steps instead of dance steps! Clean
and sober, she's going to meetings religiously. Comes with little
copy of The Big Book and six-pack of Diet Coke. |
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12. |
Post Menopausal Barbie. Poor Barbie wets her pants when she sneezes, forgets
where she puts things, and cries a lot. She is sick and tired
of Ken sitting on the couch watching the tube, clicking through
the channels. Comes with Depends and Kleenex. As a bonus this
year, she comes with the book, "Getting In Touch with Your
Inner Self". |